A Musical Instrument of Torture

In the you-think-you-have-problems file, a Trabuco Canyon resident called Orange County sheriff’s deputies at noontime to complain that “his neighbor on Sycamore Drive was playing a harmonica too loudly,” the Canyon Life newspaper reported.

And for our next selection: The harmonica man wasn’t the first to strike a sour note in that region.

A Rancho Santa Margaritan recently charged that someone was “standing outside his residence, blowing on a bagpipe for more than two hours” one afternoon.

Then there was the fellow “standing in the middle of the street in Coto de Caza and acting as if he were directing a symphony,” according to a police report. Luckily, the music he heard was undetectable to others.

Unusual Occupations Dept.: “Native Montanan that I am, with a mere three years as a Californian, I am constantly amazed at the items available in your local stores,” wrote Kay Dell Parratt of Placentia (see accompanying).

She was referring to what is apparently a smiling robot companion, one with a built-in TV and radio, among other gadgets. So lifelike, too!

“Montana was never like this,” Parratt observed.

Speaking of companions: Dolores Russell of Huntington Beach saw an ad for a set of luggage that is accompanied by a marriageable individual, who can be discarded if necessary (see accompanying).

If things go well, though, traveler and suitor might be interested in the house spotted by Helen Hensley of Altadena (see accompanying).

Back to unusual occupations: Lynn Park of La Canada Flintridge was surprised to see that even hit men -- or is it hit women? -- openly advertise these days (see accompanying).

miscelLAny: Mike Kirwan of Venice saw a sign outside a store’s restroom that said: “Open door slowly to avoid striking customers and associates.” Asked Kirwan: “So customers are on strike too?

Hmmm. Interesting concept.

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at [email protected].