Minnesota 30, at Jacksonville 12: Jaguars catch...

Minnesota 30, at Jacksonville 12: Jaguars catch whatever Lions have, falling behind 14-0 before their offense can complete one play.

at Baltimore 36, Philadelphia 7: After seeing Donovan McNabb benched, Y.A. Tittle calls Eagles, asks if he can have a shot at the job.

New England 48, at Miami 28: An overly cocky Matt Cassel calls Giselle Bundchen after the game, asks her out on a date.

Chicago 27, at St. Louis 3: This was one time the old “Saturday Night Live” skit would be true: Ditka could beat the Rams by himself.

at Atlanta 45, Carolina 28: Just when it looks as if the Panthers are ready to become an elite team, they take a giant step backward.

Houston 16, at Cleveland 6: Special Thanksgiving comment: Sage adds spice to your turkey, and the Texans’ offense!

at Dallas 35, San Francisco 22: Gee, it’s so unlike Terrell Owens to draw attention to himself as he did Sunday. I hope he’s OK.

Tampa Bay 38, at Detroit 20: The 1976 Buccaneers get their hopes up but still have to wait to break open the stale soda.

Buffalo 54, at Kansas City 31: Chiefs are 1-19 in last 20 games, bringing to mind a question: When did Donald Sterling buy the Chiefs?

N.Y. Jets 34, at Tennessee 13: Do you think the Packers might now be rethinking the whole “let Brett Favre go” scenario?

Oakland 31, at Denver 10: A confused Al Davis consoles players in Broncos’ locker room, assuming he must own the team that lost.

N.Y. Giants 37, at Arizona 29: Giants improve to 10-1, the same record as the Titans. Except the Giants actually are that good.

Washington 20, at Seattle 17: Matt Hasselbeck was so bad, fans were pleading with Jim Zorn to quit coaching and play for them again.

Indianapolis 23, at San Diego 20: Somewhere, for no apparent reason, Marty Schottenheimer has a smile of satisfaction.